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Choosing Not to Help

We were in bed when we heard the clap at the gate.  This has happened before and it's never good.  We've experienced nights when someone clapped after dark to tell of an accident, domestic violence, and even a suicide.  So, last night when the clap came late, we peeked out the window and saw who it was.

That's when we made the decision.

It was the family who we've helped many times.  Their teenage daughter got pregnant and was due this week.  They were hoping that she wouldn't need a C-section, because the local health center charges for the surgery.  We've been telling them for the past seven months that they need to save for the unexpected and prepare for the birth.

A pregnancy is not an emergency crisis.  It is a planned expense.  

So, when the clap came late it was because they needed money for her C-section. 

It wasn't easy to ignore the claps and the cell phone calls, but there are times when we have to choose not to help, for our good and for theirs so as not to create an unhealthy dependency.
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Comments

  1. ChristieMay 5, 2011 at 2:30 PM

    Great post I just thought I would drop a couple of book titles on your readers that cover this idea. The first is "The Great Omission" by Steve Saint and the second is "When Helping Hurts" by Fikkert and Corbett. Both of these speak to the dependency you alluded to here.-Ken

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  2. Jill DMay 19, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    What a perfect example of Tough Love. My heart aches for their poor choices but we must all learn that our choices have consequences...good or bad. You made a wise choice.

    ReplyDelete

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