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Carried

I want to thank everyone for their well-wishes and kind words during my recuperation after surgery. I am doing well; I can pick up Timmy again and only have 2 more days 'til I can drive again! Although going through a pregnancy loss (ectopic, in our case) is a painful experience, physically and emotionally, I have seen God use this situation for good.

I have been able to share with others who have experienced losses (prior and subsequent to ours). I have sensed a real closeness with the Lord that doesn't occur on a normal, day-to-day basis. It's almost as if God has been carrying me. I know that each trial I face defines and refines my faith. In fact, God allows those he loves to suffer so we can be more like him. Peter says it clearly, "Pure gold put in the fire comes out proved pure; genuine faith put through this suffering comes out proved genuine. When Jesus wraps this all up, it's your faith, not your gold, that God will have on display as evidence of his victory." I Peter 1:7 (The Message)

I am coming to a deeper understanding of the idea of "sacrifice of praise". Although I may not enjoy a difficult situation that I am going through, I can trust that God has permitted it in my life for a reason. It is trusting God enough to praise him in the midst of suffering and sorrow, that God is glorified. The sacrifice is putting aside myself, my sorrow, my heartache and focusing my heart and my attitude on Christ in worship. Total trust. Now, for those of you who want to try this at home, it's tough. I'm still working on relinquishing my plans and my all to God and letting myself be carried. A lovely retired missionary said these words, "True worship--trust--is saying thank you to God for the hard things, even when we are not grateful and our heart is broken." Yet, even in this time of loss I have a sense of peace because I recognize that God is the giver of life. He is in control of all things concerning me and you and he goes with us, even through the desert and the valley. So, let's keep journeying, even if it's on Christ's back, and let's keep worshipping, even when there's a cost. -Julie

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