More healing - A decade later

Many of you know the story of my accident. Ten years ago this month, I was driving when our family hit a parked truck on the highway. The truck had run out of fuel and never really got off the road. The back end was sticking out about six feet on the two-lane highway. That fatal morning the truck driver, Marcelo (*), was unloading some of his goods when we impacted his vehicle. 

One of the things that made this accident so fatal, with little chance of survival, was the oncoming traffic, which blinded our vehicle. On top of that, that morning the fog was so dense that you could not see much of anything. 

For months, if not years, after the accident, I did not want to have anything to do with Marcelo. I did not want to hear his name or see him. The last time I saw him was in August 2012, in a court hearing, when I won the case against me and the case against Marcelo was dismissed with certain conditions.

Over the past couple of years, however, I started to think about Marcelo and his family and the fate that brought us together. I realized that he and I had not reconciled. I no longer felt hate or anger toward him—only sorrow. I started praying, “Lord, give me a chance to see Marcelo and give him a hug. I wanted to personally tell him, ‘I forgive you. It’s okay. No hate, worries, or guilt will bring Julie and Timothy back. We need to forgive and live the life we have today.’” 

Then exactly one month ago, a few days before the 10th anniversary of the accident, I got a call from a lawyer. He introduced himself as Ramiro (*) and said he wanted to speak with me regarding Marcelo. I went to his office, and we chatted. Ramiro was the same lawyer who, 10 years ago, had defended Marcelo. 

He explained that Marcelo had not met one of the conditions of his case. Therefore, the case against him would be reopened—unless I was willing to go to court and testify that the conditions had been met and I had nothing else to claim against Marcelo. 

Silence. I took a deep breath. And then I realized that God was giving me a chance to not only forgive and hug Marcelo, but also to stand before the same court that, 10 years earlier, had absolved me from any civil or criminal responsibility and absolve Marcelo and set him free.

I realized that God was answering my prayers. He was bringing this man back into my life. We now had the chance to add a very important layer of healing. 

I don’t know about you, but the fact that this opportunity came my way during Easter week brought tears to my eyes. Here I had the chance to forgive and set the record straight, just as Jesus forgave my sins on the cross and set the record straight and declared me NOT GUILTY. 

We were set to appear before the judge, the accusing lawyer, and the investigative police. Marcelo was on one side of the table; I was sitting just across from Marcelo. 

With Marcelo (left) and his lawyer, Ramiro (right).

When my turn came to speak, I asked the judge for a little extra time. I explained how God is the ultimate judge who sent his son to pay my debt on the cross, and I testified that God wants to do the same for anyone willing to accept his love. After about five minutes of my monologue, I apologized to the judge, asking her whether my discourse was prolonging us beyond the permitted time. The judge replied, “Please, go on. We are listening.” And I believe she meant it, almost like she longed to hear more about this unique case. 

I went on and said, “Just as Jesus forgave me, he forgives us, and I forgive Marcelo for any unpaid, unmet conditions in this case. Jesus set us free in spite of not meeting the conditions for salvation. Who am I to hold a grudge, anger, or hate toward a simple man who ran out of gas and could not get his truck off the road in time?” 

It was amazing. It felt freeing to release Marcelo and that part of my past. I did tell Marcelo, “You owe me one thing, though. Come to a men’s retreat at our church, and you will learn and hear great things about God.” This man, with tears in his eyes, said, “Yes. I want to.” I found out that his wife is bedridden. Marcelo is experiencing some difficult financial times. I told him I would be praying for him. 

I am grateful for the chance I had to experience this moment of healing with Marcelo and his lawyer, the very people who inflicted so much pain in my life and in the life of Julie’s family and friends in the aftermath of that fateful accident on April 18, 2002. 

“Keep healing and keep forgiving” could be a very altruistic theme for our lives. We all have stuff that often gets in the way of really being free to love, serve, and live abundantly. Jesus, our go to example of love and forgiveness is always ready to aid us in the process.

 * "Names changed to protect privacy"