Arachnaphobia, Anyone?

The tropical rains this week have their way of bringing out the critters. We were coming home from working at the lot at dusk tonight and I went to the clotheslines to take down the clothes before the dew set in...when I almost stepped on a tarantula. At least I had shoes on (I don't walk barefoot, unlike my Indian husband) but Norberto was walking straight toward it, sans shoes!

Paraguayans call them pollito arañas (Chicken Spider) 'cause, well, they kill chickens. It was about the size of my hand. I say "was" because my courageous husband dropped a 2X4 on it. Sorry for all the animal activists...with a toddler tromping around (he's a little barefoot Indian) we can't take any chances.

Paraguayan Weddings

On Valentine’s Day, we had the joy of attending the wedding of Sandra and Anastacio, young leaders in the church. Sandra is my assistant with Children of Promise and Anastacio, apart from his carpentry job, has a popular youth-focused radio program every night at 8:00 on our station.

We’ve been to quite a few weddings, and these are some of the uniquenesses of southern Paraguayan wedding celebrations from our North American culture:

1. Nothing is fancy. Emphasis is placed on the act of marriage and not on the decorations or food.
2. It is not an expectation that parents help pay for expenses. Most families just make it each month with regular expenses and cannot afford to pay for eleborate feasts. Most couples have to spend months saving for their own wedding.
3. Borrow as much as possible. Many times wedding dresses are borrowed 5-10 times, because few women can afford their own. Flowers, decorations, shoes and ties (Norb loans out his ties often...since he never wears them!) are commonly borrowed items. This is great stewardship and we think it makes sense.
4. Invites are delivered personally. Because Paraguay doesn’t have a trustworthy mail system, we’ve always received invitations (to any event) personally. It’s so nice to receive a simple invitation from the couple themselves.
5. Most couples do not have a honeymoon. This is a luxury that’s foreign to Paraguayans. After paying for the wedding, the couple spends their gift money (if received) on needed items for the home.
6. All wedding services are paid in cash! This is a great way to start a marriage...debt free!
7. There are no gift registries. A few weeks before the wedding, I asked Sandra what she needed, and she gave me a funny look and said, “You don’t ask that! I’m just happy with whatever I get!” Nobody gives impractical gifts. Only items such as dishes, towels, sheets, pots and silverware are given...nothing frivolous or romantic.
8. Weddings are at night. Even though they are morning people, Paraguayans love weddings that start at 8:00 p.m. on a Saturday night. They love to celebrate until the wee hours of the morning with good Paraguayan and Polka music (often with live bands).
9. Christians don’t dance. In this culture, it’s not appropriate for Christians to dance, so weddings have a nice reception, with music, sans dancing.
10. Except the Waltz. I take that back. The only dance that’s accepted, is the Blue Danube Waltz, with the bride and her father (if present), her husband and relatives. Interestingly, it’s a tradition in our area, probably because of the heavy European influence in southern Paraguay.

In this wedding, the cakes were made by a lady in the church, the decorations were also done by the bride and her friends. The suit and wedding dress were borrowed. Everyone in the church was asked to bring a dish to pass, so the dinner was a church potluck!

I love the way Paraguayans rally together for a wedding. It makes sense that couples should focus on a simple celebration, not a gala event.

Would you like a Paraguayan style wedding?

When Cultures Clashes

We have some friends who are missionaries in Paraguay. They are not from the U.S., they are from another South American country. We've been observing them and we've noticed that they're struggling with fitting into the culture. One would think that because they did not cross the hemisphere or even the equator, that the cultural differences would be fewer. However, it's evident that Paraguayans do life very distinctly from our friends and the adaptation has taken its toll on their relationships.

Here are a few examples of how we've seen the cultures clash:

Our friends choose not to answer their cell phones at certain times of the day; yet Paraguayans like others to be available. They like you to answer your cell phone. They don't like talking to an answering machine. It's funny because we have an answering machine and the only people who leave messages are Americans! Paraguayans will continue to call,even up to 10 times, until they hear our real voice.

Our friends ask Paraguayans to take off their shoes when they walk into the door, but Paraguayans are offended at this request. My guess is that it has to do with not being accepted as they are. They also have a great appreciation for the red clay-like soil and they don't complain about it like foreigners do.

Our friends wake up late and go to bed late, but most Paraguayans are farmers and are early to bed and early to rise. Schools and businesses open up at 7:00 a.m.! Our friends get upset with early morning wake-up calls (as I did when I first moved here), but early callers are just the norm here.

Our friends just give a blanket greeting when they walk into a room, but Paraguayans like to be greeted personally, one-by-one. In fact, I learned quickly, that Paraguayans will break up your private conversation to greet you. It is an important part of welcome and if you don't greet someone, they will assume you are upset with them. Also, our friends still haven't gotten used to kissing once on each cheek (their culture has a different number of kisses) and sometimes end up awkwardly avoiding a kissing mishap.

Unfortunately, our friends are not gaining acceptance as quickly as they'd hoped among Paraguayans. They have studies and have brought titles with them, but they are not yet identifying with Paraguayans. We've talked to them about some of our observations, and we hope and pray that they can learn to transition into their host culture.

As missionaries moving into a new culture, it is crucial for us to walk in their shoes, eat what they eat and live life according to their rules (as long as they fall within Biblical guidelines).We've definitely had our share of cultural clashes (Paraguayan time vs. U.S. time) and made many blunders, so we continue to be refined and dependent upon the Lord and our dear Paraguayan friends to teach us and show us loving grace.

Observing our friends has caused us to question: What might we still be doing that offends the Paraguayan friends we are trying to reach? What barriers might we be building by not being sensitive to their cultural customs and rituals?

Sunday School in Guarani

It's been so fun to teach children's church on Saturday nights (our version of Sunday school). We've (Norberto and Julie) been creating dramas out of the Bible stories, doing quizzes and contests to those who listened and understood the story and have been singing songs in Spanish and Guarani!

Guarani is the second official language in Paraguay. It is the heart language of the people. While we live in a region of the country with many immigrants who speak German, there is still a good percentage of the population that speak Guarani here.

Last week we talked about Zaccheus. Norberto played the sycamore tree and all the kids wanted to be Zaccheus so they could climb up onto Norberto's shoulders! You can hear one of our helpers leading, "Zaccheus was a Wee Little Man" Guarani style AND as an extra bonus, you can even hear Norberto (the sycamore tree) singing in the background!



Now, doesn't that just make you want to go back to Sunday school!

I Love it When a Plan Comes Together!

We received an email from an audiologist in St. Joseph, MI that is more than willing to help us get the hearing aid that Jorge needs. The connections in the body of Christ continue to remind me how intertwined we are. The story will be told, another time. This, is the best news we've had all week! Honestly, I had been wondering where the money was going to come from and it was almost as if God said,

"Shut up, fool! Who am I? This is not difficult for me."

So, if you have donated to Jorge's hearing aid, THANK YOU! Your money will be used toward his fittings and extra batteries.


**Extra points if you can tell us what show these quotes come from and who said them!

Reaching Beyond Borders

This week we were visited by some of our listeners in Hipolito Irigoyen, a small village in Misiones, Argentina, about a two hour bus ride east of the radio station. A total of 17 youth crossed over the bridge for the first time to visit Paraguay, tour the radio and hang out with the youth from our church.

We took them to the ruins, had picnics and laughed together and yesterday, we dropped them off in the pouring rain to the Bella Vista port to catch a boat across the river.

Even though they were able to do a little tourism, they came primarily to thank Radio Alternativa 92.7 for their ministry to youth. One young man began a relationship with the Lord through our radio and now has his own Christian radio program on a secular station in his town! These young people use the Christian songs we play and make choreographs out of them to show in town squares and in churches.

Many of the youth shared some of their testimonies on air and all the radio staff were touched, even to tears, to hear how their work is impacting lives, not even in Paraguay! One young woman told us that she would get depressed at night and would turn on the radio, which was the only thing that helped her get to sleep. We don't realize the true extent of the radio waves and the positive influence the radio has on so many people. Thank you God for your work through 92.7, it's reaching out to those even beyond the Paraguayan borders.

The First of a Thousand Steps

We waited in the Doctor's office after a beautiful summer rain had cooled down our 100 degree temps. The Dr. (let's call him Dr. Depressing) was 30 minutes late. While we were waiting we prayed for God's work in Jorge's life and trusted in God's work in this young man. Apparently, Dr. Depressing had had a long week, because he didn't seem to remember us from our first consultation two days ago. He did an Audiogram and a Tympanogram. I waited outside with my pile of books to entertain Timmy during the exam.

He called me in after the testing to tell me gravely that Jorge had not responded positively. He did not hear even the loudest frequency and that he was afraid there was not much hope for him. I started launching my questions:
Would he benefit from a hearing aid?
What about cochlear implants?
Was there a specialized teacher that could help Jorge learn to read and write?

Dr. Depressing looked at me without smiling. In fact, he didn't show any kind of human warmth during our entire visit. He told me that cochlear implants aren't available in Paraguay and he said that he didn't think a hearing device would help, but he gave me the number of an audiologist just to get me off his back.

I called the audiologist before leaving his office and his secretary told me that he doesn't work on Friday afternoons. I sighed (a little loudly) and began to tell our story. She asked me to hold and came back on the phone to say, "Since you came from far away, the doctor will see you!"

We headed straight to his office. My first impression of him was he was an exact replica of "Doc" from Back to the Future. Dressed complete with the long white lab coat, the long white hair and endless energy. He was indeed Dr. Energy!

He immediately hooked Jorge up to a very sophisticated machine. He told me that Jorge had one frequency (I'm translating from Spanish, so I'm not quite sure of the technical term) in his left ear and two in his right. He tried the left ear first and when he spoke, we looked at Jorge to see his response. Nothing. He clapped, nothing. He hit the wall, nothing. Jorge was waiting expectantly, but with each head shake "no" his chin grew longer and his eyes lost their glow. His mom excused herself to go outside and cry. All her hopes, prayers and dreams for her son had been shattered. I went out to hug her and she cried on my shoulder. There were no words to share our disappointment and utter despair. I left her alone outside to grieve and I snuck back inside like a fly on the wall hoping upon a prayer that God would do a miracle in his other ear.

The doctor switched the apparatus to the right ear and he spoke. Nothing. Then he clapped and to our total surprise, Jorge's head jerked. Dr. Energy clapped again and Jorge smiled the biggest grin I've seen on this child. He shook his head "yes" and showed with his thumb and index finger that he heard a little bit. I called for his mom to come quickly. She ran inside to see her son's face light up the room! Jorge motioned for Dr. Energy to make more noises. Dr. Energy said, "Ho Laaaa" "Ho Laaaa" and Jorge gleamed. He motioned for Jorge to repeat the words and unbelievably, Jorge said, "Ho Laaaa" back. Then Dr. Energy mouthed with exaggerated movement, "Ma maaa" and Jorge repeated him like a little parrot. This time, Jorge's mom cried tears of joy, not tears of sorrow. She had not heard her son call her by name since he was a baby, before the meningitis.

Now Jorge wanted to hear his parents talk. He pointed to his dad and when he spoke, Jorge hugged him. When his mother spoke, he stroked her face. They all embraced and hot tears starting rolling down my face. I didn't feel I had the right to be an outsider looking in on this precious family moment, but I was so incredibly thankful at that moment for the miracle of modern technology and that God heard our prayers.

Dr. Energy started pacing around the room like a restless tiger. He was delighted with the results and continued to make different sounds, explaining that Jorge had lost the ability to recognize an object with its particular sound, but would quickly recuperate the most powerful hearing aid he carries, Siemens Infinity Super Power. While Jorge has severe hearing loss, he will be able to pick up tones and will possibly be able to speak again with training. Jorge started making all different kinds of noises; he was banging the table and hitting the floor. When his parents scolded him, Dr. Energy said, "Let him experiment with his new ears!"

As we were heading out the door, Jorge almost didn't get into the car. He told his mom that he wanted to take the hearing aid home. She explained that we have to buy it first. He asked if he could spend the night at Dr. Energy's clinic. Dr. Energy was so gracious, he didn't even charge us for his time or the tests. I hated to leave, knowing how much that hearing aid will change everything about his existence.

Yesterday was the type of day that I wish I had every day. It felt like Jorge was given new life. It's the bringing sight to the blind and sound to the deaf that is part of the holistic ministry we seek.

The hearing aid will cost $800 including a fitting and two-three check ups. This is the first of a thousand steps for Jorge. We desperately want Jorge to have new ears. If you know of a foundation that could help Jorge, please let me know! If you or your church wants to help us buy the hearing aid, click on the green donate button on the right hand side of our webpage and designate "Paraguay Jorge".

Will Jorge Hear Again?

Yesterday I took Jorge to the doctor. When he was 18 months old, a case of meningitis took away his ability to hear. Now, Jorge is 13 and he has NEVER been to an audiologist or had an evaluation to see his level of hearing loss. Unbelievable for our culture, but fairly common here. Last year, I wrote about trying to get Jorge into a special school for the deaf. After one week in school, to my utter disappointment, he dropped out because it was far from home and he missed his family.

Tomorrow we are traveling to our state's capital to do an audiogram with the specialist. Thanks to special funds from Children of Promise, we will be able to know if Jorge will benefit from a hearing aid.

Jorge was so excited about our doctor's visit yesterday he asked his mom, in their informal sign language, if he was going to hear again.

"We'll see," she replied.

The doctor told us that since it had been so long after the illness that they are treating the child, the possibility for him to speak is slim. He told them that Jorge needs to learn ASL and that he needs to go back to the school for the deaf. Jorge's mom didn't like what she heard.

My heart breaks for this boy. He needed care long ago, but his parents didn't know how to go about seeking help and they had no funds for testing and therapy. There are no special schools for children like Jorge in our area and the sacrifice of sending their eldest to a boarding school far away is too much for them to handle.

There are no easy answers for Jorge. I see his future as very hopeless without education and therapy, and quite honestly I see their fear and ignorance as unhealthy obstacles to their son's healing and growth. I get easily frustrated with the fatalistic mentality of Paraguayans. They don't fight for solutions to their problems because the road might be difficult or costly. I need wisdom to know how far I should go to help Jorge, and still respect his parent's wishes for him.

Would you pray for us as we do the testing and work out our next steps for Jorge.

I'll let you know how the testing goes tomorrow.

Personal Space Differences

Q. How many people can you fit into a Suburban?

A. Depends on where they're from.

Americans = 9 Paraguayans = 18

This is due to a few factors:

1. The personal space factor. Paraguayans have a much closer personal space than their North American counterparts. Latin Americans are touch-friendly, while Americans don't like to touch each other while sitting in a vehicle.

2. The size factor. Paraguayans are relatively slender people, in general. Americans, well, are not.

3. The necessity factor. Most Paraguayans in our region do not have cars. When people (especially youth) want to go places, they have to catch a ride if they don't want to walk. In this case, it would have been 30 km!

We helped out with a youth retreat this weekend with 63 young people. We showed the film "Facing the Giants" and had soccer tournaments, canoe races in the lake and ate fresh pineapple for snacks. It was a great and meaningful time! Here are a few pics from our weekend.


FYI: That young lady is married to the man she is sitting on.


Getting ready for a picnic


Timmy had just jumped on his dad's stomach and obviously enjoyed the reaction he got from his father!